10 Things You Should Never Say to a Drag Queen

Lydia L’Scabies on what not to say to a Drag Queen

1. Have you seen RuPaul’s Drag Race?
Duh – Obviously. Would you ask someone in a football shirt if they watch Match of the Day? It’s somewhat obligatory to watch RPDR as it showcases what the mainstream Drag world are up to, and is a good reference point of what not to do. It’s a brilliant show that has done wonders for the community (100% sincere) but it’s just the tip of the iceberg, and y’all should be out there supporting local, up-and-coming Drag performers.

2. Do you dress like this all of the time?
Drag is a performative play on gender or modernly interspecies when looking a the ‘Club Kid’ strand of Drag styles. This is our ‘uniform’. Would you dress in your work polo every day for a laugh? Didn’t think so.


3. Do you do your makeup yourself?
Again – occupationally speaking – does a plumber dress in their plumber’s uniform of a morning but then sit and watch someone else do the job? Most performers do their own makeup unless dealing with more complex stuff like big prosthetics. It’s just an eye roll of a question and implies doubt of the capability of the Performer.

4. OH MY GOD, YOU LOOK LIKE *insert famous Drag performer name with the same hair colour/related or inspired style/lip colour/you get the idea.*
There is nothing more infuriating than being called a replica. There are many styles out there, and we all know originality is mostly dead. Comparisons are drawn frequently between those individuals who are seen as alternative/ ‘spooky’; anyone with white-out contacts instantly gets compared to Sharon Needles. Now, they may be a fan and they may have been inspired, but I don’t know anyone who is going out of their way to copy another Drag performer. Drag is a very personal interpretation, and for that to be questioned (regardless of how alike they may seem) can be upsetting/annoying:  “OH MY GOD, YOU LOOK LIKE PEARL, BUT GREASY.” Thanks, babes, thanks.

5. Are you a *insert gender assumption*?
It’s none of your business, and who cares anyway? It’s 2019, why do you feel the need to know what’s in between someone’s legs?

6. Is that your real hair?
Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn’t; you can usually tell. We know it looks good, that’s the point darling. Do not reach to touch the subject whilst asking this question, because you may get more than just a verbal response. You have been warned.

7.  Do you ever have sex in Drag?
See the answer to question 4. Whatever floats your boat sweetie, but again; we’ve probably just met soooo…

8. Can you do my makeup sometime?
I am not doing your makeup pro bono love. You can ask the babes at Mac or, any other makeup counter to do that for you as that is their job. We’re here to party/perform/entertain you.

9. Are you going to have a sex-change?
This question is not only offensive to Drag performers, but also to the Trans community. It is not a change, it is a reassignment to what the individual identifies as! And ONE MORE THING! Why would you ask that to someone you just met? Where are your manners? *tuts*

10. Hay gurrrrrrrrrrrl/ werrrqqqqqq queeeen/ hunttyyyyyyyy/ Yaaaas
I know this terminology has been made popular by the contestants on RuPaul’s Drag Race, but do your homework kids; “yaaaas” has been used somewhat ironically of late, particularly by cats on the internet. Yaaaas? More like, no.

Follow Lydia on Twitter.


  • Sexuality questions
    Hope you're having a good day! Below, if you want, what is your sexuality?
  • Being a Biracial Lesbian
    Being life as a lesbian is complicated, but a biracial lesbian? It's really tough. Backstory: My Russian mother meet my dad while they both immigrated from their home countries, Russia and Mexico. Fell in love, got citizenship, got married, blah, blah, blah. I don't traditionally look like a Latina, having pale skin. I get told, […]
  • I think I'm finally starting to Break down 🙁
    Hi guys I think I'm starting to Break down because everything bad that's happened to me keeps coming back and it's not going away 😔 I broke up with my girlfriend because she had a lot of underlying mental health issues and I wont go into details but she ended up hospital and she's out […]
  • I AM CONFUSION #whatthefawkismysexuality
    Im a 17 year old female, and im confused!!!!!! ive always been a bit boy obsessed and i CRAVE validation. But getting older i experimented with a female friend and i also find her extremely attractive (sexually too). she kinda opened my eyes to the fact that i find a lot of other girls attractive […]
  • Hello :)
    Hi, you can call me Hestia! I'd love to make new friends on here! 🙂 I want to improve my mental health figure out my sexuality, hopefully that'll work out! I deal with bad social anxiety so please keep that in mind, I don't mean to ever be rude or anything ❤️ Things I love: […]
  • Being a third wheel in friendship triangles
    So, it seems like all my life I've been a third wheel, always an extra in friendships. I don't even remember having a friend group that wasn't a threesome. I want to become more than a third wheel, but how?