Appearance & Body Image

>>> If You Feel Ugly... Let's Talk About It! >>>

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    I'm a 15-year-old girl and really struggling at the moment, I've never really thought about what I looked like up until the beginning of last year. It all began just because of a few people, they probably didn't even realise what they said meant anything. Once a friend asked when the last time I had plucked my eyebrows ( I had never even thought about them before) now I'm constantly plucking my eyebrows so they look "perfect". One day our friend group compared lips, I was the girl in our group with the smallest lips. Once I was at a sporting competition and a boy that was sitting with us was looking around to see who the biggest forehead and I was the lucky girl who got picked. I now get what a in my class meant like 4 years ago when he teased me and said "Lucy Longface". I absolutely hate what the side of my face looks like I look so gross. I hate what I look like with my hair down I never ever wear my hair down in public. The suckiest thing is that my best friend is so beautiful, she has big lips, long blonde hair, cheekbones, small forehead, she has abs and I can't even look in the mirror when I'm next to her because it makes me feel crap. She says I'm beautiful but I don't think she means it. The only thing that I actually like about myself is that I'm tall. That's it. And sometimes even that sucks. The worst part is that I hate feeling like this and I want to be beautiful so bad. I'm not even halfway through high school and my self-esteem is low. How am I gonna fix this?

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        nommmster Thanks so much for sharing - I think as a society we are inundated with pressure to look, present ourselves and behave in so many ways, and the landscape and 'rules' are constantly changing that its impossible to keep up! It's of course not easy at all but as we can't ever reach these 'expectations' then why even try. Whats that expression? Something like, it being a form of rebellion to be yourself.....

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            LucyMc I get it - life can feel like a constant comparison but I would absolutely believe what your friend tells you - you are beautiful. It can be hard work unpicking the negativity we are left with when people focus on specific parts of us but it can be done.

            Every time you feel negative about your brows or lips, make yourself focus on something positive about yourself immediately - with practice we can cancel out the negative patterns.

            If it helps, write a list of all the things you like about yourself, so you could start with your height. What else do you like about yourself?

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                I fought with my sister and she yelled to me, "you don't even realize how ugly you are!". Although it's just a sibling's fighting, she never told me that I'm beautiful (but she said so to our other sister). I got bullied when I was a kid, and they even told me that I'm ugly. I don't even have a boyfriend, and there aren't anybody flirting me. It's hard to convince myself that I am beautiful, when anybody shows interest on me. So, I guess that's how it is

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                    Saraa_ Hi, I know how much this hurts but when people are angry they usually yell something that will hurt the most. Siblings, even though they love each other, can say the meanest things and they know what makes us feel vulnerable. It doesn't make it right as that hurts a lot but it also doesn't make it true. You ARE beautiful.

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