General Bullying Questions

How To Respond When Being Bullied And How To a Tell People?

Community General Bullying Questions How To Respond When Being Bullied And How To a Tell People?

Viewing 5 posts - 1 through 5 (of 5 total)
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  • #19009
    Avatar of alexhelm123
    alex123
    Participant

    Hello Everyone,

    One of my main stumbling blocks is finding ways to respond to a bully or how to tell people about it. It would be good to know some simple steps to take when you are in the middle of being bullied.

    I tried to set boundaries with a couple of bullies on two separate occasions and the situation escalated and felt I had to apologise just to survive the job. When I am in the middle of a situation I feel very intimidated, nervous, angry and anxious and it’s very hard to communicate.

    The sense of powerlessness and fear of losing a job or it preventing getting work is the most damaging thing to deal with. I have started to broach the subject to my new local Union rep but my current problem seems to be widespread in my local community that I feel like I will sound like a troublemaker or paranoid as I have encountered so many situations.

    I work in the performing arts in a region where there is a lot of serious low self esteem issues and poor working practices. Six years ago I set up a network to help people find work and instead of building a community it has isolated me. I didn’t realise the full extent of people psychological issues out there until my network took off.

    Day to day I can rationalise situations and this site has helped unlock a few mental blocks to make myself feel better but there is an underlying sense that these situations are blocking my way forward in getting future work. Hope this all makes sense as I am aware it’s a lot to digest.

    #19124
    Avatar of allen1307
    allen1307
    Participant

    First i would like to say i know what you are going through as i am going through a similar situation at work myself.
    I told my close friends then i was writing notes as evidence dates times of the bullying.
    Finally i reported it.
    It is scary to tell people i know but i also rang acas (if you are in the uk) for advice.
    I feel really bad for you it is horrible what is happening.

    #19127
    Avatar of peach311
    peach311
    Participant

    Hey Alex,

    Thanks for your post it all makes total sense. There is a lot to process when it happens in the workplace and one big side effect of being bullied is that we second guess ourselves a lot.

    This blog article has some practical steps on how to deal with it and might help if you haven’t already seen it.

    10 In-the-Moment Things to Remember when you’re Being Bullied

    Allen1307 is right ACAS is an amazing resource for exactly your situation, the link is here:
    http://www.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=1339

    Reach out to them as well and see what they recommend as well.

    I understand why you don’t want to be seen as a troublemaker but that is not the case and your wellbeing is a too bigger price to pay to stay quiet. You deserve to take action to protect yourself.

    Sending support and positivity
    -Peach311

    #19381
    Avatar of alexhelm123
    alex123
    Participant

    Hello Peach And Allen,

    Thank you for your amazing responses. Now I have been with Ditch The Label for a few months I am really reaping the benefits so a massive thank you again for all your ongoing support. I didn’t realise I could go to Acas for advise so I will certainly get in contact and also look through these ‘in the moment’ things to remember. I am discovering there are just so many things that need unlocking.

    #19393
    Avatar of peach311
    peach311
    Participant

    Hey Alex123,

    You are so welcome and getting through this is all about empowering yourself and taking action. Which is not easy as going through a hard time it can feel like the last thing we want to do. But keep going and we are always here if you need to talk or support.

    Sending positivity
    -Peach311

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