Disability

my mom uses a wheelchair and people stare

Community Disability my mom uses a wheelchair and people stare

Viewing 13 posts - 1 through 13 (of 13 total)
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  • #13232
    Avatar of bingabong
    bingabong
    Participant

    hi everyone
    my mom had an accident a few years ago which basically meant that she could no longer use one of her legs and she now uses a wheelchair. if we are out getting groceries or whatever, people always stare and i get embarrassed. like i love my mom and i’m proud of her but i don’t know what to do when people stare? i feel guilty even asking because she’s my mom and i love her. oh btw, it’s just me and her because my mom and dad got divorced and he moved to the west coast so i don’t see him much

    #13236
    Avatar of harper
    Harper
    Keymaster

    Hey Bingabong,
    Thank you for being so honest and brave. What you are feeling is completely natural and normal and it’s a big change, which takes time for everyone to get used to. People will often stare at people if they don’t understand them. Unfortunately we rarely see adequate representation of people in wheelchairs in the media we consume and so naturally, for some people it is somewhat of a ‘novelty’. The important thing to remember is that your mom is still the same person she was before, she’s just now sat down and moves around in a wheelchair instead of on her legs. Nothing else has changed. The reason people stare is not your mom’s fault. One way of dealing it may be to smile at them and see what happens. What do you think?

    Harper

    #13243
    Avatar of jake
    jake
    Participant

    sometimes in public people stare at me i think because I’m overweight idk. but then sometimes i dunno if it’s just me being paranoid. i try not to think about it and ignore it when it happens. not worrying helps a lot

    #13246
    Avatar of bingabong
    bingabong
    Participant

    actually thats really helpful advice. what if they say something when i smile at them?

    #13247
    Avatar of harper
    Harper
    Keymaster

    @bingabong, it’s unlikely that they will, but if they do – be kind and treat them with respect and they will hopefully do the same back to you. Kindness and compassion are great tools for dismantling hate and ignorance. If at any time you feel uncomfortable, speak to your mom.

    #13251
    Avatar of bingabong
    bingabong
    Participant

    ok i’ll try that thank u

    #13345
    Avatar of bingabong
    bingabong
    Participant

    hey just an update, i actually tried ur advice yesterday harper and they smiled back and looked away and i think my mom noticed too. it made me feel a load better already so thank u xo

    #13518
    Avatar of robert
    Tears
    Participant

    Awww, I’ll remember this. The way you dealt with it is so nice. <3

    #13522
    Avatar of peach311
    peach311
    Participant

    Nice one Bingabong, well done for trying something different. 👍🏼

    -Peach311 🌺

    #14260
    Avatar of louise19
    louise19
    Participant

    Hey

    I know I’m late to this thread but wanted to say how happy it made me to read.

    ❤️

    #14409
    Avatar of bingabong
    bingabong
    Participant

    thank you louise. this thread has helped me a lot, i check back quite often to remind myself of the advice. i told my mom about it and she’s really thankful i have the support from you all so thank u 💕

    #17623
    Avatar of jayb
    jayb
    Participant

    This is awesome, nice one guys.

    #20197
    Avatar of randomguy
    randomguy
    Participant

    yeah i agree with everyone on here because people do stare like i’m diabetic type 1 and whenever i do my stuff on public transport or in a resturant people always stare but you just get used to it also my parents are divorced as my dad lives in a different country,.

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